Pink Panthers (-120)
Red Day (-120)
Over 7.5 Goals (-120)
Under 7.5 Goals (-120)
Notes: Just one of the most brutal days of D5 planning in the history of the league. As such my commentary will probably be lighter than usual. And by lighter I mean in terms of quantity of words but not really in brutality because why should these teams get off lightly based on the actions of the parks department? So in one corner we have pink who is 2nd in the league standings but got beat up 4-1 in their last game by a purple squad that’s good but also under .500. In the other corner is a red team that beat down Double Teamed 6-4 last week in a game that wasn’t as close as that final score indicates and featured some of the worst defending I’ve seen from that yellow team, which is really saying something considering what’s become par for this league and also considering I drafted that yellow team. In their first game red got pummeled 7-2 by camo but that team is also in first and neither Weaver bro was there. Tonight they won’t have Nate but the more time that goes on the more I wonder if it’s really Campbell and Tarnow calling the shots in that red front office anyways. Then again Nate does handle close to 97% of the team’s yelling from the bench. I have this game rated as a total toss-up but, assuming it does happen, I would prob lean towards red moneyline.
Pink Panthers (+150)
Shake ‘n Bake (-230)
Over 8.5 Goals (-110)
Under 8.5 Goals (-130)
Notes: This game is on no matter what unless a flash thunderstorm or other ridiculous act of god goes down which at this point wouldn’t be surprising in the slightest. I think both teams have strong rosters because no ones asked me for subs and neither team wanted this game moved although Shake n’ Bake did ask not to play a second game later. That said it might be due to the fact that they have fathers on their team like Mitch currently and Tommy soon and Minsky in spirit. I think pretty much everyone is going to take Shake n’ Bake despite the teams having identical records, but it’s always tough to tell what’s happening in one of these weird Rens bowl games. One thing that does usually happen though: weird shit and a lot of scoring. Even with the inflated total, it’s the over for me.
Hootie & The Doug Fish (-145)
Hockey at Glatt’s (EVEN)
Over 10.0 Goals (-120)
Under 10.0 Goals (-120)
Notes: No offense to Rensbowl or the other flex games on the schedule but this is the game of the night. The #1 team in the standings and the #1 team in the upcoming power ranks (spoiler alert) vs the #1 team in the preseason power ranks and the two time defending champs. It’s also the first line in ages to feature a double digit goal line; honestly not sure how it could be any less with camo averaging five goals per game while Glatt’s is averaging 5.5 goals per game but also an astonishing 7 goals against per game. The line may look funky but two things: 1) don’t overreact to small sample sizes of one night of Glatt’s and 2) Doug Fish won’t have Lucas and Ken is a GTD. They still probably have to be favored considering how dominant they’ve looked and with Doug playing the best hockey of his career, but Glatt’s is a live dog particularly if this turns into a total shootout. We also have some wild storylines including Bramson vs Zuck for the first time since something happened behind the far net that caused Bramson to almost brawl with everyone at the rink and a rookie of the year rematch between Tony and Brooke. Well, not really a rematch because neither are rookies anymore and she won that referendum quite handily but this year she ascended to a 3rd round pick while Tony was technically given the honor of being Glatt’s 1st rounder. It’s the game of the night and I’m expecting record ratings on the stream, which is to say 9 live viewers. Betting-wise, it’s the over for me if Everett lines up at forward. If he’s on D, live bets only for me (DM for those).
Red Day (+145)
Hockey at Glatt’s (-215)
Over 9.0 Goals (-130)
Under 9.0 Goals (-110)
Notes: The final game of the night and whether it happens or not depends on whether a group of lax bros descend upon 96th street at 6:00. Just insane. It’s also a shame Nate’s out for this one because Bruger was planning on crunching him again and I think the viewers on the stream would have really enjoyed seeing that (I had already advised Glatt’s leadership to make sure it happened on the north side of the rink in front of the camera but it appears it won’t happen at all now). I’ve seen Glatt’s lineup and it’s pretty good for tonight. I haven’t seen much of red’s but they do have Carter in and even without Nate, they’re built around depth as always (and Kevin of course). Glatt’s has to be favored, partially because of Nate’s absence, partially because I can’t believe they will continue playing the kind of defense I saw in week one all season, but red is consistently underrated every season and they did kind of give it to Double Teamed last week. Man do I wish Nate was in for the Bruger crunching. Anyways I have to go to the rink and see if lax bros show up. Very exciting stuff. Take the over.