Week 1 Betting Lines (Fall 2018)

Team Sexy (-140)
The Varsity Warriors (EVEN)
Over 7 Goals (-120)
Under 7 Goals (-120)

The pick: The Fall season kicks off with a championship rematch, albeit with totally different rosters.  Last week the Warriors won the inaugural cup, and many of those players will return this season for the title defense.  Ben and Charlotte are back, as are Derek, Brennan, Nicolette and goalie Tim Burke with his new tandem partner, Ed.  That core is joined by Sebastian of last year’s first place Cheetahs defense, Matt Zimmerman (four goals in three games last season), and all around savage Matt Russo.  Ed will be getting the start tomorrow against a somewhat under-the-radar Team Sexy squad.   In a league where the average team has about 4.9 non-BTSH players, this team has 10.  There are a lot of potential sleepers on this team and a lot to like on the back-end where Barch will allow his team to take all the chances they need.  This game looks destined to be a close one, but we see Sexy prevailing in a low scoring affair.

The Purple Parrots (+140)
Hungry Hippos (-180)
Over 7.5 Goals (-140)
Under 7.5 Goals (EVEN)

The pick: The Hippos enter the Fall season with renewed hope after suffering through a rough summer campaign.  They’re returning several old faces including Hicks, Cheeky (out til late October), Michelle, Lee, Adam and Sizzler in net, but augmented by some new D5 rookies in Sweet Baby James McQuade, Hughes, Roberts/Emily, Kelsey and veteran Ariel QBing the offense from the point.  The Parrots, meanwhile, are led by LJ and the top two rookies of 2017 (Campbell & Hogg) now together and living in perfect harmony.  Hogg’s work schedule aside, this game is likely to be decided in net where Campbell will be out of action and a sub goalie, possibly Ed, will go toe-to-toe with Zisser to start the season on the right note.  The instinct may be to bet against the Hippos, but they are going to be a dangerous squad and are likely to start the season with an opening night victory over the shorthanded expansion Parrots.

Ball That (-130)
The Charging Cheetahs (-110)
Over 8.0 Goals (-120)
Under 8.0 Goals (-120)

The pick: Two of the consensus top teams in the league in the league face off in week one.  Rich has been telling anyone who’ll listen that Jeff crushed the draft, even going so far as to bet $20 on him for the scoring title and the championship.  Rich, of course, was the man who told me the night before the draft that he would “probably have to block Miles” in the 2nd round, then totally failed to do so.  With Will/Pete on the 2nd line and scoring options up and down the lineup, this is the most dangerous attack in the league.  The Cheetahs, of course, have never lost a regular season game and had the #1 overall pick in the draft which they used on the man sometimes referred to as “Gabe the babe.”  He’s likely to play D with Sena and form the league’s most potent d-combo.  This isn’t the defensive powerhouse that they were last year but with Sully coming home to play on the 4th line and Olivier, Akhil & Matt Stabel chipping in some goals, this team is solid up and down and made to pull upsets.  And come tomorrow night, I think they will.

My Cup Size Is Stanley (-110)
Cleveland Browns (-130)
Over 7 Goals (-120)
Under 7 Goals (-120)

The pick: The late game promises to have a little bit of everything as it pits a defense-first Browns team against a pure scoring team in Cup Size.  Jenn picked up a team of great shooters, with Joey Bats, Cherie, Rosen, Fein and Swersky capable of ripping it past the goalie from anywhere past half-court.  Unfortunately, someone needs to pass to these people,, and they’re facing Tim so soft goals are about as likely in this game as Ovechtricks.   That means they’ll have to forecheck hard and wear down a Cleveland Browns defense led by Boatsex Brad taking on one of the great challenges in sports: bringing a championship to the Browns.  This team is probably better than you think it is, with Luke a dominant player anytime he shows up and Alyssa one of the most underrated girls in the league.  This is likely to be the highest scoring game of the night, and picking a team called the Cleveland Browns to win anything is always a dicey proposition…but under the bright lights of the night game, they’ll pick up their first win in franchise history.

*When you bet on -150, it means you would have to wager $150 to win $100 (plus your initial bet back).  A bet on +130 would mean you risk $100 to win $130.  Thus, if you see one team at -140 and one team at +110, it means that a bet of $100 on the favorite would get you $71.43 back (plus your initial hundred), while a bet of $100 on the underdog would get you $110 (plus your initial hundred back).  EVEN means a bet of $100 gets you $100 back.  Over/under bets are on total goals in the game and have been listed separately to avoid confusion.  In the event of a shootout the winning team is credited with one “goal” for standings and over/under purposes.

**Players are considered to be rookies if they have never played a D5 game in their lives, even as a sub.

*** Contact Hicks if you have a gambling problem

Leave a Reply