Week 1 Betting Lines (Spring 2019)

Rainy Day Kids Club (-130)
Goonies (-110)

Over 8.0 (-120)
Under 8.0 (-120)

The pick: After an offseason rebrand, the inaugural D5 champion Varsity Warriors franchise is back as the Rainy Day Kids Club. Probie’s former linemate, snowboard buddy and general bff Derek was selected by Cherie in the first round before Ben had a chance to get him, forcing his hand and giving him an easy choice as he promptly selected his longtime goaltender Tim Burke through tears. He’ll center the first line while Matt Russo returns to center line two and Creamy anchors the defense the same way Probie anchors the babysitting unit in the DiMotta household. Derek will be in Colorado for game one of the season but Cherie has three time defending BTSH goal scoring champion Mike T filling in, along with D5 rookies Sean Fleming and the man known as Ebenezer supplying secondary scoring. With Derek in the lineup and considering Cherie’s chemistry with him, the line would probably lean towards the Goonies; as it currently stands, however, they may have to say die on this day. Probie with the game winner in a tight affair.

Purple Parrots (-120)
The Charging Cheetahs (-120)
Over 8.5 (-110)
Under 8.5 (-130)

The pick: It is often said that goalies are creatures of habit and Campbell proved this adage true recently, first by showering five times within 24 hours during a hockey tournament, but also by selecting basically the entire Black Squirrels roster in the most recent D5 draft. He’ll pair this scrappy bunch of guys with his Cobra Kai captain LJ, two time District Five champion (and defending Ladies Scoring Title champion) Julie Katz, league webmaster Tracy and a host of other vets. His teams biggest advantage will be in net as the Cheetahs will be using noted agitator Shaun deLacy who hasn’t played in net in years but surprisingly sports the highest save percentage in D5 history, allowing 0 goals in one period of action in Week 4 of the summer season. The Cheetahs opted for speed in the draft, with Sweet Baby James, Roberts, Carlin and Sully giving them the legs to run with the Squirrels/Parrots. Too many variables in this one for me to give a conclusive pick, but the under is looking real sexy.

Chosen 1s (Jeff doesn’t play) (+140)
Winter Is Coming (Jeff doesn’t play) (-180)
Over 9.0 (-120)
Under 9.0 (-120)

Chosen 1s (Jeff plays) (-105)
Winter Is Coming (Jeff plays) (-135)
Over 9.5 (-125)
Under 9.5 (-115)

The pick: The other team to rebrand, the artist formerly known as Team Sexy is paying homage to the upcoming final season of Thrones with a team name signifying all the righteous fury of the scorned stark children. Much like Campbell with the Squirrels, Alex has added basically half the LBS starting lineup including last season’s #2 scorer and points per game champion Luke Sellick. Kelsey will shore up the defense, Zisser will provide the goaltending and Eli will provide the goonery (much to Rosen’s envy) to give the blue team a well rounded group. This would’ve been a great matchup with Luke taking on his former D5 captain Rich and the guy who overtook him on the season’s final day to win the scoring title, Jeff, but it appears neither of them will be in attendance tomorrow night leaving Brad and Joe P to anchor the defense while Riegler and Ryann try to give the team enough scoring to get past Ziss. Greenwald will do his damndest in goal (and hopefully won’t be using that absurd stick he sometimes uses at scrimmages that has no blade on it), but the blue team has a full lineup and should get past the artist formerly known as Ball That. UPDATE: With whispers of Jeff now playing there are two lines for this game.

My Cup Size Is Stanley (-135)
Hungry Hippos (-105)
Over 8.5 (-125)
Under 8.5 (-115)

The pick: Week 1 concludes with a rivalry game between two original six franchises. The last time these two met the game ended in controversial fashion as two disputed late penalty calls led to the Hippos scoring on a last minute 5 on 3 off an impressive no-look goal from Kelsey. The goal launched the Hippos to the #2 overall seed which they would ride all the way to the finals, beating the 7th seeded Cup Size in the semis along the way. Cup Size always maintained that the 5 on 3 was precipitated by a Hicks dive, and the guy is undeniably strong – I once watched a man run at him full speed in a broomball game and bounce off, despite the fact that that guy was wearing broomball shoes and Hicks was wearing sneakers. Hicks brought back last season’s defensive anchor Ariel and added Sena and Seb to give the Hippos perhaps the strongest D unit in the league, but they’ll have their hands full with Cup Size’s deadly 1-2 punch of big Canadian men Gabe & Hogg. The true wild card in this game (and for the black teams season) will be the goaltending of Zak Casca, selected early in the 3rd round despite no one in the league having actually ever seen him play in net before. If he turns out to be as good as Jenn is banking on, this team should be the odds-on favorite to win the title. If his adjustment from ice to ball proves difficult, however, Cup Size will not be able to take as many chances and will have to adjust their game plan accordingly.

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