*For those who may not be total degenerates – when you bet on -150, it means you would have to wager $150 to win $100 (plus your initial bet back). A bet on +130 would mean you risk $100 to win $130. Thus, if you see one team at -140 and one team at +110, it means that a bet of $100 on the favorite would get you $71.43 back (plus your initial hundred back), while a bet on $100 on the underdog would get you $110 (plus your initial hundred back). EVEN means a bet of $100 gets you $100 back. Over/under bets are on total goals in the game and have been listed separately to avoid confusion. In the event of a shootout the winning team is credited with one “goal” for standings and over/under purposes.
**For those who easier identify the teams by captain: Cheetahs=Jo-Ann, Cup Size=Jenn, Sexy=Alex, Hippos=Hicks, Warriors=Probie and Bombay=Sully.
The Charging Cheetahs (-140)
My Cup Size Is Stanley (EVEN)
Over 7 Goals (-120)
Under 7 Goals (-120)
Two of the hottest teams in the league face off in a game with major playoff implications. A win for the Cheetahs, either in regulation or OT, would clinch the #1 seed for them. Unlike in BTSH where the regular season is basically just a five month excuse to run a bit, drink in a park every Sunday and have sex with random hockey players, top seeding here has tangible benefits, as in both playoff weeks they will face a team playing its second game of the night. A loss by the Cheetahs in overtime would open the door for Team Sexy to take first place by winning out. The Warriors couldn’t top the Cheetahs in a straight up tiebreak (because the Cheetahs beat the Warriors last week
), but could win the tiebreak if Team Sexy also won out and all three teams were tied in points because they would each have the same record against each other and we’d have to move past the second tiebreaker of regulation wins, the third tiebreaker of total wins and all the way down to the fourth tiebreaker of goal differential. A Cup Size win in regulation would put them in striking distance of taking first place themselves as they would own the tiebreakers over the Cheetahs and Team Sexy, but potentially not if the Warriors got involved and made it a 4-way. Confusing huh? Let’s just take the under and move on with our lives.
Over 9.5 Goals (-170)
Under 9.5 Goals (+125)
Last time these two teams met it produced a 12 goal game where Team Sexy put up a still league record nine goals
. At the time, the Hippos were winless and integrating their new guys on the fly, not to mention the fact that they didn’t have anyone providing
for them. Alas, the Hippos looked like a totally different team last week in a thrilling 4-1 victory which featured four goals in the final seven minutes, including three unanswered by the Hippos, big saves, and a surprising amount of bad blood. Team Sexy, meanwhile, lost in a shootout to the suddenly streaking Cup Size, although that game featured two Sexy goals called off and a heroic performance from Eric Ramirez between the pipes. Dave GDR is back from his vacation and presumably excited to play on a team which has a chance to win in the playoffs. The showdown in nets between the Mike Richter style of Zisser and the (insert 80s goalie here) style of Dave will be key in determining how this matchup goals. Expect Dave to come out with a vengeance and Team Sexy to take the decision in regulation and keep their #1 seed aspirations intact going into the makeup round.
Over 8.5 Goals (-120)
Under 8.5 Goals (-120)
The pick: The Varsity Warriors were 2-0 going into the late registration period and, according to most observers, made out with the best of the late adds with Guido, Mike and Glanzer boosting their male ranks from 5 to 8. Since that time, however, they dropped tight contests to My Cup Size Is Stanley in OT and to the Cheetahs 5-4 in regulation last week. Some have attributed this to sloppy play, others to puck luck, others to having Glanzer on the roster (even if he wasn’t there for last week). Five goals was the most they’ve given up this season and they’ll have to do better defensively if they’re going to get that top seed and a playoff full of favorable matchups. Probie has already locked up the scoring title but also bet a significant amount on his team to win it all and will thus be extra motivated to perform in this one. With ScottyK in town and Creamy making his District Five debut, this is a chance for a statement game from the Warriors. Bombay is a good team and will be using quality free agents Luke and Brett for this one, but the absences of three of their top guys (Hogg, Ellison & JRo) will be too much to overcome. Under the bright lights of the nationally televised night game, the Warriors get back on track with a much-needed victory.