Week 7 Betting Lines (Fall 2018)

Hungry Hippos (-130)
The Charging Cheetahs (-110)
Over 7.0 Goals (-120)
Under 7.0 Goals (-120)

The pick: The opening game of the slate sees two contenders who could really use a win face off.  Cheetahs started the season 3-0 and looked like they might find a way to repeat last year’s impressive undefeated regular season, but have fallen on hard times lately and dropped their last three by a combined score of 17-7.  Tonight they should have most of their roster in tow, including defensive powerhouse and aspiring keeper of the cup Gabe Chenard.  The Hippos will have most of their roster in tow except with Tim Burke subbing for Zisser who is going to the Ranger game and not, as you might expect, the brothel.  These teams are evenly matched and while the Hippos will try to win with speed, the Cheetahs will use their veteran know-how to control the game and open up scoring opportunities for Sully, Olivier and Courtney “Hat Trick” Ryan.  Will Hicks, McQuade, Kelsey and co be able to match them?  This has a similar feel to it as the OC final between the ultra fast Shortis and the veteran saavy of Cecil Harambe…and we all know how that one turned out.  Take the Hippos to keep the momentum going and Adam to keep on sniping.

Ball That (+110)
The Varsity Warriors (-150)
Over 7.0 Goals (-125)
Under 7.0 Goals (-115)

The pick: Two of the preseason favorites go into this match needing a win to keep their hopes alive for a top four seed and consequent first round bye.  The Warriors have been plagued by poor attendance but picked up their first victory of the season last week, giving their fans hope and also giving Cat Tremble $10.  They’ll be without the services of Derek, Brennan and Matt Zimmerman, but Probie’s been surprisingly quiet this season and some would say he’s due for a blowup game.  The same cannot be said for Jeff (the quiet, not the blowup) as he’s currently tied for 3rd in points with five goals and four assists in just four games.  Orange will be missing Miles, Will, Pete, Alexa, Amanda and probably a few others which, along with Jeff’s probable hangover from Sunday, is going to make it tough for them to win.  They’ll have some solid subs including Riegler, Carlin and Fleming in his D5 debut, but expect the Warriors to keep the momentum going and pick up their 2nd win in a row.

Team Sexy (-140)
My Cup Size Is Stanley (EVEN)
Over 8.0 Goals (-120)
Under 8.0 Goals (-120)

The pick: A few weeks ago this game looked like it would be a total mismatch with blue on top of the standings and black winless and in disarray.  Heading into week 7, Team Sexy remains tied for first in the standings but Cup Size has completely turned their season around with three straight wins, two of them coming in a shootout.  Tonight they’ll be without the services of Joey Bats, but Sexy will be without Avery (wedding stuff), DeMarco (Miami stuff) and Caitlin (102 fever stuff).  The key to this game will be in net where Dave GDR will look to build off his recent momentum (and possible three stars snubs) to get the better of Barch who is undefeated on the season.  Well, that and which of your league managers is more likely to offer the refs a little something extra for the win.  Game is probably too close to call, but the under looks like a strong bet here.

The Purple Parrots (+120)
Cleveland Browns (-165)
Over 6.5 Goals (-120)
Under 6.5 Goals (-120)

The pick: The Parrots have been playing a ton of hockey lately with their last two games going to the extra session, but don’t expect that to wear them out.  LJ does crossfit and while Hogg is a last minute scratch so he can play in an NJ Zog championship (as opposed to the league formerly known as Fake Zog), Fleming is an elite athlete so long as he’s not getting his face destroyed by eyewear and will be playing his 2nd of the night in relief for the Parrots.   If that wasn’t enough to take you from six to midnight, Creamy has been on a tear and Henry is a darkhorse choice for the defense scoring title, which he currently leads by a hair (a hair that comes from the best flow in the league).  The Browns, meanwhile, are firing on all cylinders.  Since an early season loss to Team Sexy in a game where they led by two goals, they’ve been borderline unstoppable.  Luke, Yetter and Julie constitute by far the most productive line in D5 while Tim K has been his usual unflappable self in net, sitting at #1 in the goalie ranks and having allowed no more than three goals in any game this season.  The Parrots are tough to count out with a slew of under-the-radar talent, a fast, feisty style that wears teams down and Campbell being one of the only goalies who can match Tim save-for-save.  But the good people of Cleveland have been waiting a long time for a winner and it appears they finally have a team they can be proud to root for.  Under the bright lights of the primetime game, count on the Cleveland Browns to keep rolling and solidify their hold on first.

* Contact Hicks if you have a gambling problem.  For more info on how lines work see here.

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