
Julie’s Football Club (+150)
I Just Blue Myself (-200)
Over 5.0 (-130)
Under 5.0 (-110)
Public Perception:

Notes: These teams are close to mirror images of each other due to a strategic partnership between Julie and I which certainly worked out quite well for her last Summer. While orange doesn’t have George this time around and sadly won’t have Tash, they do have one of the deepest teams in the league: between Malik, Amit, Dave Liang, Joe Mosk, Mitch and Swersky, they can come at you in waves and Zisser has had his finest D5 season yet with his first #1 goalie award and is now looking to become the first goalie in league history to win three championships. Blue, on the other hand, will have most of the lineup in tow save for Tony D, Robyn and possibly Tim who said he was in last week but who the hell knows if he’s in Texas inspecting a HelloFresh facility or shotgunning 27 beers with Rockoff just for the fun of it. These teams split the season series with each winning by multiple goals, but it should be noted that blue’s loss came without Miles. As noted in the player of the year email earlier today (vote now!), blue is undefeated on the season when Miles is in the lineup. Anything can happen in the playoffs and I do think if Tash was in this would be close to coin-flip territory despite what public perception might say. But without their best player, I think orange will struggle to get clean breakouts and it will cost them. Blue to win and advance to the finals.
Bonus Lines
Points In This Game
Malik + Dave (+160)
Miles + Tim (-220)
Points In This Game
Amit (EVEN)
Alex (-140)
Points In This Game
Mitch (-120)
Sam Gelman (-120)
Will Dave Liang Record A Point?
Yes (-120)
No (-120)
Will Cherie Record A Point?
Yes (-120)
No (-120)
Will Miles Score A Goal?
Yes (-110)
No (-130)
Hungry Hippos 2.0 (-175)
Green Street Hooligans (+130)
Over 5.0 (-145)
Under 5.0 (EVEN)
Public Perception:

Notes: The rematch that was promised all season comes to fruition as the 2nd seeded Hooligans face the 3rd seeded Hippos. Black was ranked #1 in the preseason power ranks but finished 3rd mostly because of a loss in their first game to green. This team has offense, defense and elite goaltending; there are really no weaknesses on this roster and with a tight two lines coming tonight, their top players will be eating a ton of minutes. Green, meanwhile, was 6th in that opening ranking and never got above 4th, a position they held in the final ranks of the season despite their #2 seed. Everyone’s been doubting them all season (myself certainly included), but at a certain point it’s hard to argue with the stats in front of you. Don Draper once said, in one of the only quotes I put on my long neglected Facebook profile, “when a man walks into a room, he brings his whole life with him.” Similarly, Bert Cooper said earlier in the same series “a man is whatever room he is in.” And thus, I have to say that despite all my reservations about green all season, once a team gets this far, they are what their record says they are and green is an 8-2 team. I would rate this game as close to a coinflip, as most games this late in the playoffs should be, if they weren’t missing their top playmaker (Tom) and their goalie. Those absences put them behind the 8 ball and give the Hippos a clear edge, but I still think this game will be extremely competitive. If the Hippos can use their superior size and shooting to get pressure on, they should win. Green will need to rely on speed and forechecking to wear black down. I don’t have a prediction for this game except that if Hicks scores a big goal he is sure to unleash one of the biggest cellys of his life, and that is really saying something. Advertisers are expecting record ratings for this one and I can’t wait to see it. Get your popcorn ready.
Bonus Lines
Points In This Game
Hogg (-175)
Stern (+130)
Points In This Game
Hicks (-145)
Neil (EVEN)
Points In This Game
Adam Satok + Tom White (-145)
Yehuda + Russo (EVEN)
Hicks Points
Over 1.5 (-105)
Under 1.5 (-135)
Will Eli Karp Record A Point?
Yes (-110)
No (-130)
Will Yehuda Record A Point?
Yes (-120)
No (-120)
Will Evan Larkin Record A Point?
Yes (-120)
No (-120)
Will Abby Record A Point?
Yes (+120)
No (-165)
D5 Championship
Orange or Blue (-150)
Black or Green (EVEN)
Orange or Green (+130)
Black or Blue (-180)
Over 4.5 (-130)
Under 4.5 (-110)
Public Perception:

Notes: Why are you betting on a game where you don’t even know any of the teams playing yet? Oh, that’s right, because you have issues. Well, lucky for you, you’re in the right league for them. No idea what will happen here but I will be drinking afterwards either way. Feel free to join me. See ya tonight.