My Cup Size Is Stanley (-175)
The Seahorses (+130)
Over 6.5 (-135)
Under 6.5 (-105)
Notes: This league truly has it all. We already have Commissioner Bowl, the Fireball Bowl turned Preworkout Bowl turned Bad Boy Mowers Pirate Bowl – welcome to what I’m unofficially calling Jewish Broad Bowl (we can workshop that a bit). This matchup was rescheduled from a previous rainout and the subject of a protracted negotiation that took years off my life, but it is finally happening. Yellow will be without Brett Marks, Scott Metz, Paige and Will while black will be missing Mikey, Liam, Jacob and AJ. Yellow will get Cam in net while black will be using Sonj who has truly taken up the mantle left vacant by Jeff Green’s most recent departure for goalie who gets a fuckton of free games. In fact, Jeff has often told me that whereas most look at their GAA, or their wins, or shutouts, or save percentage in the sicko ice leagues that track shots, the stat he cares most about is GPRF, aka Games Per Registration Fee. I had never heard of this stat before he brought it up to me but it is a certainty that Sonj is #1 in that stat this season after Cardello won it as a roster player last season. Anyways, for the game itself, the public money is no doubt going to be on black but the recent form of each team gives me pause as black dropped all three of their games on Tuesday while yellow has recovered from a dreadful start to pick up four straight regulation wins, bumping them from last place all the way up to 7th with a chance to finish as high as 5th if they win tonight (!). It won’t be easy without some of their top players and their goalie but as predicted in the first edition of this season’s power ranks, this is a totally different team when Tom Fitz is in the lineup and they will look to prove it here. Despite Sonj’s elite level, hardware-worthy season, I’m probably taking the over in this one.
Layin’ Pipe (+130)
SexyBack (-175)
Over 6.5 (-120)
Under 6.5 (-120)
Notes: A rematch of Tuesday night’s matchup and last season’s championship. Unfortunately both teams will be missing all sorts of players tonight; KG will be in for blue, possibly a guy sub although blue will likely just opt to play shorthanded and feed people minutes as is standard procedure. Silver will be without Tommy Dom and Andrew and using APK in net while blue will be without myself, Sammy, Brooke, Santo, Rebekah, Emma…I can’t even list all the absences but suffice to say, they are many. Blue should have the slight edge here but I could really see this one going either way and have only seen APK play in net once. Likely to be a close one and while Tarnow wants to get in as a sub, it’s highly unlikely. Under seems a decent bet after Tuesdays 2-0 result, as does someone throwing up during the game. Probably Chad.
SexyBack (-120)Red Floyd Guns N’ Roses (-120)
Over 6.5 (-120)
Under 6.5 (-120)
Notes: This game is likely to be played 4v4. It won’t be quite as much of a shitshow as the last time these two teams met when Gelman got his first career start in net with, shall we say, mixed results, but it will be a super random crew. As such, I’ve been asked to inform everyone that for one night only, Red Floyd is Guns N’ Roses because they are all hired guns…mercenaries from the streets of the Upper East Side. Red will only have Nate, Tarnow and Sonj from their regular roster and will supplement them with Ashkon, Milstein, Ray, Lew, KG and Sarah Goss. Blue will have the roster from the previous game but with a TBD lady sub rather than KG. One of those classic Friday night games I have no idea how to handicap so let’s just call it a toss-up and hope both teams end the season in the friendly spirit of a carefree Friday night game with tequila shots at Dorrian’s to follow. Anyone who wants to drop by, we’ll have the back room. See ya later (maybe).