MelRose Home (EVEN)
Red Sabbath (-145)
Over 6.0 (-110)
Under 6.0 (-130)
Notes: MelRose is missing Chucky Perks, Wes, Robyn and Erik with Russo a solid maybe. Red is using APK in net and I’m not really sure what the rest of their lineup looks like but considering Campbell Tarnow and Nate are likely to be there, I have to like their odds against a severely depleted yellow team. It’s still a difficult matchup to handicap because I am on record predicting that this will be a down year for red, but like Shooter McGavin told Happy Gilmore on the final hole, you have to play the ball as it lies and for tonight I see a toss-up slightly leaning red. Of course, that plot point was kind of ridiculous and I’m pretty sure they would pause the event if there were severe construction accidents / vehicular assaults going down ON THE COURSE during a major tournament, but I digress. Red to win.
The Grassholes (EVEN)
Red (-145)
Over 6.5 (-105)
Under 6.5 (-135)
Notes: APK stays in net for red while Geskin returns from his yearlong hiatus to sub in for the Grassholes. Green looked awesome in their opening game of the season although I would say the score may have been slightly deceiving; they definitely outplayed the Pranksters, but I wouldn’t say that dominated the way 4-1 may lead you to believe. Still, they’re a dark horse contender and on a normal night I would have them favored over red by a few goals. Tonight is no normal night though and it’s going to be a bunch of subs, making this another game where I can’t believe I’m doing this after my preseason ranking of them, but I have no choice but to make red the slight favorite for the second game in a row.
My Cup Size Is Stanley (-1.5 Goals) (-165)
MelRose Home (+1.5 Goals) (+120)
Over 6.5 (-120)
Under 6.5 (-120)
Notes: Jenn’s at Chiclets but requested this date which makes me think her roster is going to be pretty solid, especially for a Friday night. MelRose has some absences but quite honestly not a total disaster for a Friday. Really tough to fill up the old word count for a bunch of matchups where I have no idea who’s really playing and after fielding almost as many complaints on four hours of zooms as I do on a standard afternoon running this league. Still, the same way I might blindly bet on a team after seeing line movement and public sentiment, I’m blindly favoring/betting on black because of Jenn’s schedule requests. If her lineup was bad, there’s no way she would have not just requested the first Friday but a day where she’s not even in town. Read the signs people. Cup Size by two or more.
Merry Pranksters (-155)
The Grassholes (+110)
Over 6.0 (-145)
Under 6.0 (EVEN)
Notes: Two badly shorthanded teams. Two sub goalies. Rosters that are up in the air and seemingly change by the hour. Captains who want to win but also will no doubt be thinking about Dorrian’s while they play. I’m giving the edge to the Pranksters but as usual tonight I would really reconsider betting on these bizarre matchups unless you have serious gambling issues. Then again I was up til 3 AM betting on the Chengdu Open last night so I’m the last one to throw stones on this. Give me Pranksters moneyline and parlay it with the over you animals.
My Cup Size Is Stanley (-130)
Merry Pranksters (-110)
Over 6.5 (-125)
Under 6.5 (-115)
Notes: Jenn has Cam in net, Pranksters have Geskin. Both will be playing their third games of the evening. Not sure who will be more tired but it’s the late Friday game and historically those are some of the highest scoring games. I’m pretty sure both of the highest scoring games in league history (17 goals) took place on Fridays. Tuesday was also insanely low scoring with an average goals per game of 4.33, compared to our standard which vascillates between 6.5 and 7.5. We are due for some regression and I’m betting this is the one. Take the over and thank me later, and by thank me I mean buy me a tequila shot. See ya @ Dorries.