Mean Girls (+2.0 Goals) (+150)
My Cup Size Is Stanley (-2.0 Goals) (-230)
Over 6.5 Goals (-130)
Under 6.5 Goals (-110)
Notes: Opening night in D5 and the lines tonight are mostly reflective of public perception, fairly standard for week one when no one really knows for sure what to expect from any of these teams. I can tell you for sure based on the power rankings and on conversations with other players/captains that no one is expecting much from either of these teams. I personally think pink will be better than expected but the people have spoken and with Cup Size getting a basically full lineup in tonight, it’s going to be tough sledding for the Mean Girls, particularly if Yehuda keeps doing that move where he runs in circles until he gives the ball away. I don’t know Emma that well but I’m not sure if she’ll enjoy watching that one while she’s wide open at the circle. I also have no idea if Yehuda has any dirty tricks up his sleeve but whatever he’s got, he’s going to need it as Hogg is actually playing in this game for black. Cup Size by two. If pink does as poorly as people are expecting it may mark the last time any women ever says yes to Yehuda, let alone two of them.
My Cup Size Is Stanley (-1.5 Goals) (-180)
Reds N’ Roses (+1.5 Goals) (+125)
Over 6.5 Goals (-110)
Under 6.5 Goals (-130)
Notes: Cup Size has an almost full lineup while red was texting me about goalie subs, player subs and every trade under the sun for the past couple days. This does not bode well for Nate, Tarnow & Campbell who do consistently do better than everyone’s projections indicate but did also have a weird season last spring. Geskin will be rolling in from Brooklyn to fill in for APK who is on a bender in Cape Cod this weekend, but with Hogg, Lucas and the ghost of Matt Bramson ripping shots from everywhere it may be a tough night at the office for him and red. Cup Size, once again, to win by two boobs.
The Mighty Ducks (+1.5 Goals) (+150)
Untitled Sex Team (-1.5 Goals) (-230)
Over 6.5 Goals (-135)
Under 6.5 Goals (-105)
Notes: Both teams are badly shorthanded as the Ducks had six guys, two girls and no goalie while blue had five guys and one lady. Cam and Steve Rys will jump in for the Ducks while Dave Liang, Yehuda, Sheila and Jeff Green will hop in for blue. It’s a real shame because this was slated to be the game of the night and because the Ducks specifically requested to play this date before apparently getting hit by nonstop last minute absences. I’m possibly somewhat biased but all those absences make this an uphill climb for green. Over also looks enticing in a Friday night game which is likely to be more wide open than usual.
Reds N’ Roses (+1.5 Goals) (+150)
Slime Time Live (-1.5 Goals) (-225)
Over 6.5 Goals (-120)
Under 6.5 Goals (-120)
Notes: Green demanded that their late game with the Ducks get cancelled only to actually have basically their full roster showing up except Jake. He swears it wasn’t for him but skepticism is certainly warranted. In any case, with a full roster, green is the only team that got screwed as they probably would’ve been looking at two wins tonight over shorthanded teams had they just stuck with the original schedule. Instead they’ll probably have to settle for one. Red of course will have their core in this one and Simon jumping in the net, but I think a basically full strength green team will be too much for them to overcome. Slime Time to take this one down. See ya @ Dorrian’s.