Week 4 Box Scores (Spring 2019)

Winter Is Coming vs The Charging Cheetahs

1st Period:
CHA (1-0) – Danny Swersky (1) (assisted by Andrea) (3:25)
CHA (2-0) – Matt Kolakowski (1) (unassisted) (12:13)
2nd Period:
CHA (3-0) – Sully (1) (assisted by Chris Snell) (3:21)
WIN (1-3) – JRo (2) (assisted by AFrey) (6:28)
3rd Period:
WIN (2-3) – Susie (1) (assisted by Luke) (5:58)
WIN (3-3) – JRo (3) (unassisted) (6:50)
Shootout winner by AFrey

GAME NOTES: Before the evening, Jenn told me it was supposed to rain around 11 PM so it would be great if we could have all the games run on time. Naturally, this game went to a shootout…Danny Swersky, in his first season away from Jenn’s boobs (gone but not forgotten), got the scoring started early in the 1st. After deLacy made a breakaway stop on JRo so powerful that it destroyed his pad (true story), the Cheetahs went the other way and just before Zisser could cover the ball, Danny swiped it from under his glove and put it in the yawning cage. It was his first of the season…Matt made it 2-0 when he stole the ball at mid-court and was able to race in for a breakaway, which he threw top shelf where Zisser keeps the lube. Early in the 2nd, Sully buried one top shelf to put the Cheetahs up 3-0…JRo got the comeback started on a rebound goal in front. The blue team peppered shots at deLacy throughout the 2nd but he and his shot-blocking, Poutine-like defense was up to the task…Susie got her team within a goal when she buried the rebound off a Luke wrap-around stuff-in attempt. Less than a minute later, JRo buried his 2nd of the game and suddenly shit was getting gangster wild up on 96th…the teams traded chances in OT, with both goalies making point blank saves including a buzzer beating stop by deLacy as time expired. In the shootout, however, the LBS-inspired lineup of Luke/Kelsey/Alex/Zisser were able to slip two past the goalie and that was all she wrote…as I was typing this writeup and enjoying a nice Starbucks cappuccino, JRo banged on the glass at said Starbucks and held up two fingers. Since the Rosens know nothing about peace, I’m assuming it was a reference to the two goals he scored so he does indeed get the #1 star…with the win, Winter Is Coming maintain their hold on 2nd place although the Parrots have a game in hand due to annoying rain out situations. The Cheetahs fall to 7th and will look to get back on track against Campbell and the Parrots next week (assuming his two week long Puerto Rican sex party is indeed over).

3rd – Sully (1G)
2nd – Susie Lai (1G)
1st – Josh Rosen (2G)

My Cup Size Is Stanley vs Chosen 1s

2nd Period:
CHO (1-0) – Ryann (1) (assisted by Becca) (7:31)
CUP (1-1) – Rachel Longley (1) (assisted by Hogg) (11:43)
CHO (2-1) – Jeff (5) (unassisted) (12:28)
3rd Period:
CHO (3-1) – Jeff (6) (assisted by Becca) (12:02)
CUP (2-3) – Justin Sorice (1) (assisted by Gabe) (12:31)

GAME NOTES: The second game of the evening saw a thrilling matchup of Boobs vs Jews as Cup Size flew into Tel Aviv to face the Chosen 1s…after a scoreless first period, Ryann opened the scoring in the 2nd on a feed from Becca. She also almost put her team ahead by two shortly after but the refs ruled that the shot hit the crossbar, even if Ryann and Brad think the refs are dirty dirty liars…Rachel potted her first of the season to even the score but less than a minute after that, and with just 32 seconds left in the period, Jeff ripped a shot from near center that found the top corner and gave the Chosen 1s the lead heading to the break…in the 3rd, the black team tried everything they could to even the score but Dave GDR, in relief of Dave Greenwald, was tremendous. Eventually Jeff buried an empty netter and though Justin was able to score in his first game of the season to lower the margin back to one, the orange team hung on for a tight 3-2 victory…Jeff had two goals to give him six in four games this season…Ryann and Becca’s connection moved both of them into the all-time top ten for ladies’ scoring…this was a massive victory for the Chosen 1s. With a loss, they would have been 2nd to last and fighting an uphill battle going into the back half of the season; instead, a regulation win puts them in 5th right in the middle of the pack. Cup Size has the same exact record as the Chosen 1s but sits one spot ahead in the standings due to the goal differential tiebreaker.

3rd – Dave GDR (2 GA)
2nd – Becca (2A)
1st – Jeff (2G)

Goonies vs Rainy Day Kids Club

1st Period:
GOO (1-0) – Zach Fein (3) (assisted by Ebenezer) (2:33)
GOO (2-0) – Cherie (1) (assisted by Zach Fein) (7:20)
GOO (3-0) – Derek (5) (assisted by Cherie) (11:41)
2nd Period:
GOO (4-0) – Kevin (3) (assisted by Derek) (7:50)
3rd Period:
GOO (5-0) – Derek (6) (assisted by Emily Barbour) (1:29)
KID (1-5) – Mia (2) (assisted by Matt Stabel) (4:40)
GOO (6-1) – Creed (1) (assisted by Brett) (8:36)
GOO (7-1) – Derek (7) (assisted by Creed) (12:51)

GAME NOTES: The final game of the evening (due to rain, sadly) featured the first place Goonies against the last place Rainy Day Kids Club. As we wrote in the preview, these games don’t always go the way you would think. It appears that sometimes, however, they go far worse…Zach Fein got the scoring started early in the first and added an assist on the Goonies 2nd goal. He is now top 15 all time in D5 points…Derek picked up a hat trick and an assist, with his final goal coming in the final seconds of the game and earning him a loud chorus of boos. To be fair, though, the Goonies did make a ton of passes on that final possession. He is now in the top spot in this season’s scoring race…ever the good teammate, Derek texted me to campaign for his teammate Emily Barbour to get the #1 star for her shutdown defense. Sorry Derek, but the hat trick takes priority. She does earn kudos though for her best game of the year…Cherie played at forward in this game and unsurprisingly picked up a goal and an assist…Mia scored for the Kids Club, who actually played a strong game and were not quite as out of it as the score might suggest. As the great philosopher once said, sometimes you’re the pigeon and sometimes you’re the statue…the Goonies tighten their hold on first place and will face the Chosen 1s, who won a tight game against Cup Size this week but who the Goonies defeated in week 3 5-2. The Kids Club and their swanky umbrella hats will look to get on track against Winter Is Coming, who they almost beat in week 3.

3rd – Emily Barbour (1A)
2nd – Cherie (1G, 1A)
1st – Derek (3G, 1A)

We could have used those for the late game.

Hungry Hippos vs Purple Parrots

GAME NOTES: Game postponed due to rain. Makeup will be Friday, April 12.

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