Weeks 11 & 12 Box Scores (Spring 2022)

Mavericks vs Royals

2nd Period:
MAV (1-0) – Ryann (6) (assisted by Malik) (0:53)
MAV (2-0) – Ryann (7) (assisted by Malik) (7:36)
MAV (3-0) – Jason (8) (assisted by Malik) (14:31)
3rd Period:
MAV (4-0) – Jason (9) (unassisted) (4:30)
ROY (1-5) – Justin (2) (assisted by Meg) (9:51)
MAV (5-1) – Ryann (8) (assisted by Kevin Mahoney) (12:10)

GAME NOTES: Red, orange and camo had a three game mini round robin tournament. The first game saw the Mavericks on fire, spurred by a three goal 2nd period and a hat trick by captain Ryann Geldner. She many not cross center ice, but she sure knows how to put the ball in the net. Jason would add two goals as the Mavericks put up a 5-1 win…Casca subbed in for Eric in this one and was excellent in only giving up one goal. This was also Dan Burns’ debut as a full-time member of the Mavericks…can’t remember much else about this game, it was a week and a half ago and there’s been a 9 games, a full-on rainout and multiple disciplinary incidents since then. Painful month.

3rd – Jason Campbell (2G)
2nd – Malik (3A)
1st – Ryann (3G)

Royals vs East River Kraken

2nd Period:
ROY (1-0) – ScottyK (6) (assisted by Jess) (2:35)
KRAK (1-1) – Cat (1) (assisted by Jared) (11:39)
KRAK (2-1) – Jared (6) (assisted by Rockoff) (13:08)
3rd Period:
KRAK (3-1) – Nicole H (1) (assisted by Goose) (1:43)
KRAK (4-1) – Rockoff (1) (assisted by Dan T) (3:16)
ROY (2-4) – Vanessa (2) (assisted by Noah) (4:26)
ROY (3-4) – ScottyK (7) (assisted by Meg) (6:53)
ROY (4-4) – Mike Wright (1) (assisted by Russo) (9:45)
Shootout Winner By Mr Braun

GAME NOTES: Brutal beat for under bettors in this one as a 0-0 game after one and a 2-1 game after two turned into a 5-4 Kraken win after a five goal 3rd period. The live line got all the way down to 5.5 but in the end the original 9.0 line ended up being a push…balanced scoring for the Kraken as they picked up goals, regulation and shootout, from five different players. Blowing a 4-1 lead with 11 minutes left isn’t ideal but they were able to pull through in the 4th round of a shootout to pick up two huge points and clinch a playoff spot. The expansion Kraken fans celebrated well into the night with blunts and 40s as far as the eye could see. Somewhere off in the distance, Braun shit his pants.

3rd – Braun (SOW)
2nd – ScottyK (2G)
1st – Jared (1G, 1A)

East River Kraken vs Mavericks

1st Period:
MAV (1-0) – Jason (10) (assisted by Cat Tremble) (0:54)
KRAK (1-1) – Braun (4) (assisted by Danilo) (2:37)
MAV (2-1) – Malik (2) (assisted by Ryann) (8:30)
MAV (3-1) – Tom White (5) (assisted by Cat Tremble) (9:38)
MAV (4-1) – Kevin Mahoney (2) (assisted by Tom White) (14:29)
2nd Period:
MAV (5-1) – Nate Lerner (1) (PP) (assisted by Nestor) (0:16)
KRAK (2-5) – Nicole H (2) (assisted by Jared) (8:58)
3rd Period:
KRAK (3-5) – Danilo (1) (PP) (unassisted) (8:25)
MAV (6-3) – Malik (3) (assisted by Nate Lerner) (11:49)

GAME NOTES: The final game of the mini-round robin saw the Mavericks jump out to a 4-1 lead after one period and control the game throughout. The Krak did cut the lead to just two goals with 6 and a half minutes remaining but Malik would put the game out of reach with 3:11 left to ensure the clock ran and that the Mavericks would pick up the W…after spending most of the season in last place, the Mavericks clinch a playoff spot in this game and look primed to finish in the 4-6 range. Quite a turnaround for a team with a rookie captain that has played most of the year without their 1st and 3rd round picks. Kraken already clinched in the previous game and are locked into the 6/7 playoff matchup.

3rd – Cat Tremble (2A)
2nd – Danilo (1G, 1A)
1st – Malik (2G)

Hungry Hippos vs The Goaldiggers

1st Period:
DIG (1-0) – Miles (7) (unassisted) (11:48)
2nd Period:
DIG (2-0) – Miles (8) (assisted by Zach Weiner) (8:30)
DIG (3-0) – Miles (9) (assisted by Guido) (11:32)
3rd Period:
HIP (1-3) – Neil (14) (assisted by Meatbox) (0:12)
DIG (4-1) – Miles (10) (assisted by Mike Sanchick) (2:15)
HIP (2-4) – Meatbox (5) (assisted by Jon Herman) (8:03)
HIP (3-4) – Neil (15) (unassisted) (10:39)
DIG (5-3) – Miles (11) (assisted by Tarnow) (13:42)
HIP (4-5) – Meatbox (6) (assisted by Jon Herman) (14:45)

GAME NOTES: Somehow after seven seasons, one of them jumbo-sized, where no one could store more than four goals of the game, this is our 3rd five goal game of season. Neil recorded six but it was against AK so partial credit for that one…Miles was a machine in this one but the Hippos would not quite, erasing two separate three goal deficits to cut the lead to 1 with 4:21 left, and again with 15 seconds left. Unfortunately for them it wasn’t quite enough as the Goaldiggers were able to run the clock and hold out for the victory…Miles’ five goal effort briefly put him in 1st place in the league scoring race, although Guido would (spoiler alert) put up a hattie in his final game to take that team scoring lead right back. No one leads the Diggers in scoring but Guido, everyone knows the rules.

3rd – Neil (2G)
2nd – Meatbox (2G, 1A)
1st – Miles (5G)

The Grapes vs The Blue Balls Of Sex

1st Period:
SEX (1-0) – Sam (7) (assisted by Sig) (0:29)
SEX (2-0) – Mel (1) (assisted by Sig) (10:15)
2nd Period:
SEX (3-0) – Sam (8) (assisted by Corey) (1:47)
SEX (4-0) – Nate Lerner (2) (unassisted) (6:34)
SEX (5-0) – Corey (10) (assisted by Sam) (8:44)
GRP (1-5) – AK (7) (assisted by Jack) (14:56)
3rd Period:
GRP (2-5) – AK (8) (unassisted) (3:48)
SEX (6-2) – Corey (11) (assisted by Alex) (10:55)
GRP (3-6) – Hilary (1) (assisted by AK) (13:52)

GAME NOTES: The west coast game featured a league record short bench for blue with one guy sub and one girl sub total. Although they definitely lost steam in the 3rd period where purple was able to gain some momentum and control play, Team Sex Balls jumped out to an early lead and maintained that edge throughout the game for a 6-3 win…Hilary picked up her first goal of the season, as did Mel in a not-particularly-rare sub appearance…AK continues to have a big season for purple after his selection at #2 overall over a former NHL prospect and Derek was universally panned by league pundits. AK and Jack get the last laugh on this one while Austin continues to give the blue franchise the middle finger after scoring two on them just a year after he scored 0 regular season goals for them. SAD!

3rd – Corey (2G, 1A)
2nd – AK (2G, 1A)
1st – Sam (2G, 1A)

Mavericks vs The Goaldiggers

1st Period:
DIG (1-0) – Guido (12) (assisted by Stern) (1:05)
MAV (1-1) – Ludwig (1) (assisted by Ryann) (5:24)
MAV (2-1) – Dan Burns (1) (assisted by Cat Tremble) (7:35)
DIG (2-2) – Guido (13) (assisted by Adam Satok) (3:10)
MAV (3-2) – Ryann (9) (assisted by Malik) (13:49)
3rd Period:
DIG (3-3) – Guido (14) (PP) (assisted by Tash) (0:27)
MAV (4-3) – Ludwig (2) (unassisted) (13:31)

GAME NOTES: Ludwig brought the pain in only his 3rd game of the season, coming through with the opening goal for the Mavericks along with the game winner with just 1:29 left. Phelps made a bunch of big saves on multiple 3 on 5 situations and the Mavericks held on for a hard fought win in an unsurprisingly chippy contest…Guido picked up a hat trick in the Diggers’ season finale to give him 14 goals and 21 points on the season, both good for 2nd in the league heading into the final night of games…the Mavericks will finish 6th if the Grapes beat the Hooligans in regulation in their season finale, otherwise they are in 5th and will face either Cup Size or the Royals in the playoffs…the Goaldiggers clinched a top two seed last week and will likely finish 1st unless the Hooligans either win both their remaining games in regulation or win one of them in OT/SO and the other in regulation by 5 or more…this game may have set the record for minor penalties and there were also a bunch of infractions that weren’t even called. I hated it.

3rd – Ryann (1G, 1A)
2nd – Guido (3G)
1st – Ludwig (2G)

The Blue Balls Of Sex vs My Cup Size Is Stanley

1st Period:
CUP (1-0) – Jeff Oberg (6) (assisted by Reape) (4:20)
CUP (2-0) – Jeff Oberg (7) (assisted by Tracy) (5:38)
SEX (1-2) – Dave Liang (3) (assisted by Alex) (9:12)
CUP (3-1) – Jeff Oberg (8) (assisted by Reape) (10:30)
2nd Period:
SEX (2-3) – Alex (5) (assisted by Sam) (12:41)
3rd Period:
SEX (3-3) – Sig (5) (assisted by Corey) (3:49)
SEX (4-3) – Dave Liang (4) (assisted by Sully) (10:46)

GAME NOTES: Blue had the better of possession for most of the game but fell victim to a 1st period hat trick by Jeff. Corey was outstanding in making a ton of highlight reel saves but Dave Liang, in his first game back from a month-long stint on the IR, scored blue’s first game of the season and then buried a rebound with 4:14 left to give them a lead they would hang onto for the regulation win…after scoring zero goals til April 29, Jeff now has 8 on the season, tied for 11th in the league with one game left to play…another game with more violence than an episode of Thrones (before it went to shit). Someone call the City Watch.

3rd – Alex (1G, 1A)
2nd – Jeff Oberg (3G)
1st – Dave Liang (2G)

East River Kraken vs Green Street Hooligans

1st Period:
GSH (1-0) – Kevin Aylesworth (1) (assisted by Alex Rickard) (7:40)
KRAK (1-1) – Davis (1) (assisted by Goose) (11:11)
GSH (2-1) – Rich (1) (assisted by Westley) (12:23)
KRAK (2-2) – Cat Boyd (2) (assisted by Jared) (14:56)
2nd Period:
KRAK (3-2) – Jared (7) (PP) (assisted by Henry) (12:15)
3rd Period:
KRAK (4-2) – Jared (8) (assisted by Liz Tremble) (3:11)
GSH (3-4) – Westley (12) (assisted by Rich) (3:59)
GSH (4-4) – Nate Lerner (3) (assisted by Westley) (8:47)
GSH (5-4) – Westley (13) (assisted by Nate Lerner) (3:40)

GAME NOTES: A blistering effort by the Kraken to take down the #2 team and a blistering comeback by the Hooligans in the 3rd to force OT, where they would win on Westley’s shot through a three person screen. Tough loss for the Krak but a big effort not unlike the Giants vs the Pats in week 17 of the ’07 season. Come to think of it Braun could absolutely be Eli Manning in an alternate universe…Rich picked up his first goal of the season and first of his D5 career, paying off former enemy Yehuda’s confidence in him at +250…Kraken are locked into the 6/7 playoff matchup; their opponent will either be The Grapes or the Mavericks. Considering how last week’s matchup with the Mavs went and considering Jack’s out of town next week, I’m betting that they’re hoping it’s The Grapes.

3rd – Rich (1G, 1A)
2nd – Jared (2G, 1A)
1st – Westley (2G, 2A)

The Blue Balls Of Sex vs The Grapes

1st Period:
SEX (1-0) – Dave (5) (unassisted) (6:54)
GRP (1-1) – Jack (9) (assisted by Josh Wagner) (13:47)
2nd Period:
SEX (2-1) – Zach Liebovich (1) (assisted by Dave) (12:46)
SEX (3-1) – Dave (6) (assisted by Sully) (14:38)
3rd Period:
GRP (2-3) – Jack (10) (assisted by AK) (6:46)
SEX (4-2) – Zach Liebovich (2) (assisted by Charlotte) (9:02)
SEX (5-2) – Joe Moskowitz (1) (unassisted) (9:57)
GRP (3-5) – AK (9) (assisted by Steve Rys) (12:57)
GRP (4-5) – Jack (11) (assisted by Kev) (13:18)

GAME NOTES: A rematch of blue’s 6-3 shellacking from last week looked like it might be much the same this week as team Sex Balls (we’re still workshopping it) led 5-2 with less than 5 minutes left. We proceeded to completely stop playing defense for some reason and the Grapes capitalized with two goals in 21 seconds to cut the lead to one. After a purple timeout, there was a lot of clock burning and a whole fuckton of unpleasant shot blocking to narrowly escape with a 5-4 win…Jack’s first two goals were both rebounds of wide shots that he picked up off the boards behind the net and buried before the goalie could slide over. He also picked up a hat trick, his first I believe since the famous one he dedicated to his father. Truly a touching moment in league history…Joe Moskowitz scored a highlight reel goal, going coast-to-coast and then roofing one over his brother. This might be Max’s villain origin story…with the regulation victory blue clinches at least 3rd and can finish 2nd if the Hooligans suffer at least one regulation loss in their final two games (or only pick up 3 or less points in OT). The Grapes will finish in either 5th, 6th or 7th and face either Cup Size, the Royals or the Kraken in the first round of the playoffs.

3rd – Zach Liebovich (2G)
2nd – Dave (2G, 1A)
1st – Jack (3G)

Hungry Hippos vs Royals

1st Period:
HIP (1-0) – Jon Herman (2) (assisted by Meatbox) (3:2)
HIP (2-0) – Jon Herman (3) (assisted by Neil) (6:50)
2nd Period:
ROY (1-2) – Adam Herman (1) (assisted by Meg) (2:21)
HIP (3-1) – Chris Daly (2) (assisted by Eli) (3:16)
HIP (4-1) – Neil (16) (unassisted) (0:53)
HIP (5-1) – Chris Daly (3) (assisted by Eli) (8:04)
HIP (6-1) – Neil (17) (assisted by Meatbox) (9:58)
3rd Period:
HIP (7-1) – Neil (18) (assisted by Meatbox) (4:31)
HIP (8-1) – Chris Daly (4) (assisted by Will Gill) (8:46)
HIP (9-1) – Meatbox (7) (assisted by Chris Daly) (11:14)
ROY (2-9) – Meg (8) (assisted by ScottyK) (14:27)

GAME NOTES: The final game of both these teams’ seasons was a Hippos romp. Led by dueling hat tricks from Neil and Chris Daly, the Hippos put up a 9 spot on Mike “Keebler Cookie” Zisser and won 9-2 to clinch the 4 seed…in what might be the final game of a long and distinguished D5 career Meg picked up points on both her team’s goals with a goal and an assist. To make the playoffs the Royals just need the Hooligans to either win outright or get to OT against Cup Size…I’m not sure if it’s a league record as I’m not going back through all the stats to confirm it but this night featured seven players putting up two goal games and five hat tricks on top of that. Let’s just assume that is some kind of record…technically the Hippos could still move up to 3rd despite having no games left if the Hooligans not only lose both remaining games in regulation, but do so by a combined aggregate of 8 or more goals. Absent some shocking shellackings of green on Tuesday, however, the Hippos are locked in the 4 slot and will face the winner of the 5v8 matchup on Tuesday night.

3rd – Meatbox (1G, 3A)
2nd – Neil (3G, 1A)
1st – Chris Daly (3G, 1A)

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