Week 7 Betting Lines (Fall 2022)

The Muskies (-155)
YeHooligan’s Heroes (+115)
Over 5.5 (-135)
Under 5.5 (-105)

Notes: A five game slate tonight with a 4:00 Yankee playoff game throwing a wrench into things and likely roster issues for a bunch of teams and I have to preview these matchups even though I’m tired and want to just gamble on sports and SPY options. Life is tough out here. Zisser’s missing this one but luckily the Muskies have like 5 goalies on the roster so Jacob will step in net for tonight’s doubleheader. YeHooligans haven’t asked me for any subs so in general I must assume that they’re doing fine while their goalie Eli emailed me early in the morning to ask to sub for another team, indicating that he’s either making his season debut or he wants to fuck with me. I don’t think green is nearly as bad as their last place record suggests but I’ve felt purple was elite since draft day and they’ve done nothing to dissuade my confidence, despite their complete and total lack of backchecking, as they’re tied for first place midway through the season and should have most of their big guns in tonight. Muskies to roll; Hooligans to catch the end of the Yankee game and probably care more about that anyways.

MelRose Place (+135)
The Muskies (-180)
Over 6.0 (-120)
Under 6.0 (-120)

Notes: MelRose needs a sub for Hilary and will otherwise be missing Luc, Len and Amit. With a full-strength team they could give purple a good run for their money. Missing several key team members, I don’t see it happening. DRo had a lovely baby shower on Saturday but won’t have as lovely a time tonight. Purple again.

Pinky Swear $#*! (-170)
Julie’s Football Club (+125)
Over 5.5 (-120)
Under 5.5 (-120)

Notes: Eli will be subbing in for Max in goal while pink has what should be one of their fuller rosters of the season. Orange continues to have terrible injury luck with multiple players confirmed out and multiple GTDs. They’ll have Cherie subbing in for Tash but I don’t think it will be enough to stem the tide. Assuming Wes and Jeff Green are in, pink picks up the W.

My Cup Size Is Stanley (+105)
EJ Entertainment (-150)
Over 5.5 (-120)
Under 5.5 (-120)

Notes: Black seems to have pretty much everyone in except, ironically, Jenn herself who will barely make it in from Yankee Stadium if she makes it in at all and will almost definitely be severely hammered. Blue will have a ton of absences with 7 players in at the time of this writing. Then again, EJ Entertainment demands a good party ratio and won both ends of a doubleheader Friday with 7 total players. Gamblers should remember that when placing their bets and captains should remember that when they bitch to me about shorthanded rosters. Black will be highly motivated and may rally around being ditched by Jenn but I think blue is better and isn’t scared to play a game without two full lines. EJ to bring their own boobs to the table and take down Cup Size.

Red Rockets (+105)
Pinky Swear $#*! (-150)
Over 5.5 (-120)
Under 5.5 (-120)

Notes: Red continues to miss Corey, out with a mysterious groin injury exacerbated by a bizarre squatting injury, but is quick enough to give pink problems. Unfortunately, with pink at full strength, it’s unlikely to be enough. The Scotty/Jess Civil War is a fun storyline to watch but I think the actual matchup between them will be something of a dude. Pink helmet Jess to pick up the win and bragging rights in the bedroom. Like Jack, Scotty’s just happy to be there anyways.

Leave a Reply