Red Cheeks (+2.0 Goals) (-120)
Clappin’ Cheeks (-2.0 Goals) (-120)
Over 8.0 (-135)
Under 8.0 (-105)
Notes: The first annual Cheeks bowl comes to town as I still can’t believe 20% of the teams in this league have cheeks in their name and wonder if I should have vetoed that. The black leopard cheeks are coming off a 1st place power ranking and a combined 17-1 goal differential in their past two games. The red cheeks were picked by many to be bad this year but looked pretty damn impressive last week in dealing the Pranksters their first loss of the season. This should be a classic matchup of depth vs top heavyness, except thanks to some late round sleepers clappin’ also has depth to match their superior top of the lineup situation. I don’t think they’re quite as dominant as the 17-1 would indicate, but I do think they’ll have enough to win this one handily. Black cheeks over red cheeks by two or more. I’ve also been told the points line is a mortal lock, clearly by one of the guys involved in it.
Bonus Lines:
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Tarnow + Nate + Campbell (+140)
Ryan + Pete + Tommy (-200)
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Luca + Milkman (-120)
Jack (-120)
Mojo Jojo (-2.0 Goals) (-200)
Julie’s Football Club (+2.0 Goals) (+140)
Over 7.0 (-110)
Under 7.0 (-130)
Notes: Mojo Jojo has somehow only played two games on the season due to the frankly upsetting amount of rainouts we’ve already had this season but that changes tonight as they gear up for a doubleheader. Leg 1 is against JFC who are rated by pretty much everyone as a bottom team despite a .500 record and a current 5th place seeding in the standings. Is everyone underestimating yet another orange team or is regression imminent? Probably a little bit of both but while they won’t have Joe, Mitch or Alex green will be without Steph, Seb, Matt and Corey (Sonj gets the call) but otherwise should have their full lineup in. I see this game being tight defensively with two undersized but highly skilled goalies between the pipes. In the end, though, I don’t think orange will have quite enough offensive punch to keep up with the Neil/Satok combo. Jojo by two parlayed with the under.
Bonus Lines:
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Steve Rys (-120)
Jared (-120)
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Cherie + Tash (+175)
Ariel + Danilo (-260)
Mel’s Power Trip (EVEN)
Mojo Jojo (-145)
Over 6.5 (-120)
Under 6.5 (-120)
Notes: Mojo Jojo may be tired after game one but they’ll have to face the 3rd ranked team in the power ranks immediately after. That said, yellow currently has no goalie because Mel denied Simon to sub for green but also didn’t really want him for yellow so now he’s on strike. Reached for comment Simon said “Mel said Corey is better than me but then refused to let me sub for green. After this she requested me to sub for her team against green. Yellow can fuck right off.” Good stuff. I have absolutely no clue who’s going to be in goal for yellow but have to assume Mel is asking every available goalie in the tri-state area as we speak. Green will have Cam in for this one but otherwise the same lineup as game one. I have a feeling the public is going to be riding yellow hard in this one but I think green is the better team. Bet at your own risk.
Bonus Lines:
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Pelletier (-105)
Satok (-135)
The Hart Foundation (-215)
Merry Pranksters (+150)
Over 7.5 (-120)
Under 7.5 (-120)
Notes: A rematch of one of the best games of the season but with some weird rosters. Jo Robin is out for tie-dye, replaced by Yehuda which is kind of like replacing a Tesla with a rickshaw pulled by hobos. They’ll also Pranksters will have Simon subbing in net as they showed him the love and care he deserves while Cam gets the call for pink with their goalie still MIA. It’s supposed to possibly rain at some point tonight so no idea if this game will be played or what so not going to spend TOO much time pondering the possibilities. Jo being out swings this matchup from a toss-up to pink being favored, even without their captain Jake or Ryann. Hart Foundation to pick up their first W of the season. LATE BREAKING NEWS: Joel out too. The line continues to move towards pink.
Bonus Lines:
More Points In This Game
Stern (-120)
Gelman (-120)
The Golden Girls (+2.5 Goals) (-135)
The Hart Foundation (-2.5 Goals) (-105)
Over 7.5 (-120)
Under 7.5 (-120)
Notes: Gold should have most of their lineup in for this one while pink will be without Jake and Ryann. Not sure if that’s enough to swing this matchup though as gold’s defense has had problems in front of their net in recent game and Miles is probably the worst possible player for them to face. I have more faith in this gold team than most, but I think they’re in big trouble here. If Max goes god mode, they have a shot to pull this out 2-1 or something like that. Barring something crazy though, The Hart Foundation should win this battle of winless teams and likely pick up their second victory of the night. Tough times for the Golden Girls but they’ve been through adversity before, they know how to handle it.