Bruise Control (+2.0 Goals) (+150)
The Phantom Pie Pie (-2.0 Goals) (-230)
Over 6.5 Goals (EVEN)
Under 6.5 Goals (-145)
Notes: These teams met in the regular season on May 8 in a Friday night affair which orange dominated start to finish en route to a 5-1 win. I’m not sure if that regular season meeting has any bearing on a semifinal where both teams will presumably be more motivated to bring their absolute A game for a championship appearance, but it does show how dominant orange was all season and just how well they match up with purple in particular. The biggest edge purple was able to ride all season was in net where Carl submitted a legitimately elite season, but orange’s goalie was at the top of the leaderboard all season only giving up 10 goals in 9 games. He can always steal a game, but it’s going to be a difficult task in this one against a Pie Pie team which ranked 2nd in goals, 1st in goals against and set a league record for points in a season. Purple may be this season’s Cinderella, but at some point the clock does hit midnight. Pie Pie 5-1 (again).
Chappell Red (+2.0 Goals) (-130)
Hockey at Glatt’s (-2.0 Goals) (-110)
Over 8.5 Goals (-120)
Under 8.5 Goals (-120)
Notes: This game appears to be a mismatch on paper as Glatt’s doubled red’s wins, tripled their goal differential and swept the season series. That said, this is a very different red team from what we saw in April as they’ve won five in a row after starting the season with five losses. Over the past four weeks they’re a legitimately elite team and tonight they’ll try to dethrone the defending champs by dealing them their first loss of the season. Glatt’s has two of the top players in the league but also has an impressive amount of depth this season with Sanchick anchoring the D with Zuck, Merone centering the 2nd line and of course this season’s loudest rookie of the year hopeful in Tony. However when it comes to depth red may be the tops in the league as they have two guys who could be considered 1st rounders (Kevin and Lucas) plus a host of D5 vets led by their front office trio of Nate, Tarnow & Campbell. For years they’ve been compared to the Carolina Hurricanes of D5, a comparison that makes sense for so many reasons besides just their color scheme and the Nate Lerner System. But with the Canes now opening the Stanley Cup Finals at home on the same night as red hopes to win their first D5 Cup, the comparison is more apt than ever. I think they’re uniquely suited to give Glatt’s trouble and as long as Zisser and the D hold up, it’s going to be a close game that can go either way. Not taking a winner in this one but the bet is red to cover the spread for me.
District Five Championship
The Phantom Pie Pie (EVEN)
Hockey at Glatt’s (+130)
Chappell Red (+250)
Bruise Control (+500)
Over 6.5 Goals (-120)
Under 6.5 Goals (-120)
If this championship is the first one to ever feature two undefeated teams playing each other it’s going to be possibly the most hotly anticipated one since Smurfs/Cheeks in 2024 and honestly probably ever. Red and purple will do their best to crash the party though and become only the third team seeded 5th or lower to win the cup after the 2023 Lavender Llamas and last year’s Blue Streakers. There’s no theater like live sports. See ya tonight at the rink (or at Dorrian’s).
More Points On The Night
Everett (-120)
Glattman (-120)
More Points On The Night
Craig (-145)
James (EVEN)
More Points On The Night
Tarnow (-230)
Bramson + Milstein (+150)
More Points On The Night
Kevin Tuohy (-120)
Alex Merone (-120)
More Points On The Night
Brooke (-500)
Tony (+270)
Grand Salami (total goals on the night)
Over 19.5 (-145)
Under 19.5 (EVEN)
Extra Spicy Props
Any Player Gets A Hat Trick (-155)
At Least One Game Goes To OT (+150)
At Least Two Games Go To OT (+380)
At Least One Shutout (+200)
10 Or More Goals In Any Game (+200)
Goalie Gets An Assist (+600)
Championship Winning Goal By A Defender (+160)
Championship Winning Goal By A Lady (+420)
Championship Winning Goal By A Goalie (+6000)