Hungry Hippos (EVEN)
The Goaldiggers (-140)
Over 6.0 (-125)
Under 6.0 (-115)
Notes: The first playoff matchup of the Spring 2021 season features a super talented Hippos squad that has been absolutely savaged by attendance issues against a Goaldiggers squad that many felt should have been the preseason favorite. The margin of error in this league is so slim; in week 4 of the season the Goaldiggers were up 2-1 on the Sex Panthers with less than 30 seconds left. Guido got the ball in his zone and just hit the post on the empty net attempt which DRo corralled and scored to tie the game. Then in overtime Rockoff scored on an incredible diving OT winner to give the Panthers the win. Had the Goaldiggers held on for that victory they would have been the 4 seed and the Panthers would be in this game. Instead, that small twist of fate has moved white into this play-in game and it will not be an easy one as yellow is a difficult matchup for them, besting the Diggers 5-2 on the strength of a four goal game from Mr Paper Towel himself. Friedman will be lined up at center rather than in net as he was in that lone meeting but as mentioned in the playoff scenario article, Dave GDR has never lost in his first game of any playoff run. This will be one of his toughest challenges to date as Shelly is confirmed out for this one, as is Solgon, while Seb is a game time decision. Guido/Tarnow vs the Josis is a compelling scoring battle up front but I’m more interested in the defenses where co-Leetch award winner Danilo will do battle with Brad, Sarah, possibly Seb, possibly Russo, but certainly not Shelly. Will yellow have enough juice to pull the minor upset here? Fan opinion has the Goaldiggers as a slight favorite. With full rosters I’d handicap this as a coin-flip and possibly even a slight edge to the Hippos. As it is, however, I’m inclined to agree with the fans and give the slight edge to the Goaldiggers. That doesn’t mean I think they will necessarily win because Dave GDR and playoff Meatbox deserve our respect, but Guido, Tarnow and co do deserve to be the favorites. How it will actually play out is anyone’s guess.
BONUS PROPS
First Period Line
Hungry Hippos (-110)
The Goaldiggers (-130)
Over 1.5 (-135)
Under 1.5 (-105)
Most Points In The Game
Guido + Tarnow (-120)
Hicks + Braun (-120)
Most Goals In Game
Guido + Tarnow (-120)
Hicks + Braun (-120)
Green Street Hooligans (-130)
Sex Panthers (-110)
Over 6.0 (-125)
Under 6.0 (-115)
Notes: The 4/5 matchup features two veteran squads that have met twice this season, first in week one and most recently in week eight, both games being exceptionally tight 3-2 affairs. In both games green struck early before blue mounted a rally; exciting precedent for the Panthers, but not something you necessarily want to count on in the playoffs. While all the attention will surely be on Probie and Cherie, the true key to victory in this game will be in net. Early in the season it seemed like the Hooligans were on the verge of a team breakdown almost every game and also in danger of having one of their defensemen getting his ass kicked by his own goalie. They have righted the ship in a big way and deLacy has rebounded en route to a 4th place finish in the GAA race. But he will have to keep pace with Waldman, the blue goalie who in his first season won the GAA race on the final night of the season by notching a shutout. The Panthers ended the season with the least goals scored in the league and a not-so-great -7 goal differential. They match up well with the Hooligans but the Hooligans certainly did better against the rest of the league. Neither roster will be at full-strength; AK is a game-time decision trending towards doubtful due to a flat tire and possibly cowardice. Conor broke his finger hurling like a good Irish boy. Ryann and Malik are up in Minnesota, probably making out as we speak, and the Hooligans are missing their own Austin, league penalty minutes leader in a landslide Austin Lyons. With full squads this is probably a slight edge to the Sex Panthers based on matchups, but with the absences tonight the slight edge must go to green. Probably the tightest game of the evening and one that should get the fans going on the livestream. I personally am not betting this one because it’s so close and also because I’ll be so jacked up on expired preworkout by gametime who knows what my mental state will be like. Panthers have dealt with roster issues all season, Hooligans have dealt with adversity all season. Should be an exhausting game with my money firmly planted on the under.
BONUS PROPS
First Period Line
Green Street Hooligans (-125)
Sex Panthers (-115)
Over 1.5 (-120)
Under 1.5 (-120)
Most Points In The Game
AFrey + Rockoff + Jon (-120)
Probie + Cherie (-120)
Most Goals In Game
AFrey + Jon + Rockoff + Kelsey (-105)
Probie + Cherie + Pags (-135)
Hippos/Goaldiggers (+115)
Crimson Wave (-155)
Over 6.0 (-130)
Under 6.0 (-110)
Notes: The final game of the evening will see the red-hot Wave hosting the winner of the 6/7 matchup from earlier in the night. The effects of a doubleheader seem overstated; teams playing doubles this season fared no worse than teams only playing one game on average (look at Cup Size who won 3 straight minigames last night en route to clinching the #2 seed). But the Wave have had some mojo going on since their midseason trade for Adam Herman as his contributions on the court and in the locker room have sparked a wild turnaround with red winning 5 of their last 6 games. McQuade is out for this one while Meg will be playing her final D5 game until October. She picked up the all-time record for points in a season by a lady and finished tied for 2nd in points but whichever team she plays will be able to focus extra defensive attention on her with SBJ out of action. Zisser will be in attendance and presumably not as hungover as he usually is on Sundays (you never know though) but their defense will have to step up and help him out. Whichever team they play will have a top 1-2 scoring punch (Guido/Tarnow or the Josis) ready to light it up. Flipcutler will do her part back there as a stay-at-home defender but some combination of Sanchick, Kevin and either Sully or Stabel will need to offer her some support because as we all know, when you’re riding the Crimson Wave you’ve got to keep the flow manageable. What’s fascinating about this team is how perception has completely shifted during this winning streak; when they were in last place with one point in four games, I was getting roasted for picking them as one of the top teams in the preseason lines. Now, they are the top choice to reach the championship from that side of the bracket, even over the #2 seed. Exceedingly rare that the #3 seed polls higher than the 2, even before advancing to the final four. All the momentum lies with red; without McQuade in the lineup to run 5 miles and maul everyone in sight, will they be able to take advantage of it? Facing two similarly depleted opponents, my answer is yes and not just because I routinely drink gamble and whore with many people on that team. Roll Wave and don’t look back. See ya tonight.
BONUS PROPS
First Period Line
Hippos/Diggers (EVEN)
Crimson Wave (-140)
Over 1.5 (-125)
Under 1.5 (-115)
Most Points In The Game
Guido + Tarnow + Hicks + Braun (-115)
Meg + Sully (-125)
Meg Points
Over 1.5 (-140)
Under 1.5 (EVEN)
